Milemarkers in life.
That's what birthdays are to me.
Every year I instinctively look back at where I was a year ago and what has happened.. or should I say what I have accomplished and have not accomplished. For me it is more significant than New Years.
So this year..
I must admit that this year has been one of the hardest in my adult life. It started last year at this time that I heard the Lord ask me to put full time ministry down and place full time family up.. I cried alot last November and December. Wondering what to do with my time.. with my baby.. with my husband. I couldn't believe that most of my conversations were about feeding philosophies, diaper rash, and how to entertain my toddler( while educating him).
I mean a year previous was all about going to this country and that country. . the mighty hand of God.. the meaning of true intercession.. discipling young minds etc. I look back and believe that I was in MAJOR culture shock.. just where the Lord wanted me to be.
I started looking through old "words" that I had recieved over the years and one said that the Lord was going to take me through a time of "seclusion". WOAH the time had come and I spent ALOT of time talking to the Lord.
Then in January I began running the staff girls growth group here at YWAM and having one on one's with them. It was like a breath of fresh air but still so different then leading schools.. or galavanting everywhere.
I spent even more time with the Lord. More time with Dempsey and more time with Kieva.
Then this fall was another new start. going from about 15 girls in the growth group to 4. Some changed roles on the base and now were in another growth group.. some on outreach.. and then we seperated younger and older staff.
Something else happened this year... I began to understand family more.. significance in the mundane.. gems in the daily moments of puzzle and block playing.
I also began to understand the significance of how God has made me. I am surrounded by crafting,baking, home schooling Diva's .. and I only say that in the best sense of the word. They truly are "Good Housekeeping" mom's. .. and then there is me..
I can cook.. so we don't starve. I can make a card if I would just sit down and do it.. and bake.. well I've done decent things with every boxed cake or brownie I've tried.. but at home Diva.. um.. NO
I realized that all of that makes awesome mom's but that I have other things to offer. As I work on all of those things to improve our life I also must stay true to the other calling on my life as well. I love to disciple.. I love to speak.. I love to learn.. and I know that when I am involved in those things I am so much more fun at my house.
But here's the craziest thing.. one year has gone by.. and I am not only still breathing but am more intimate with the Lord.. more assured of HIS steadfastness.. and more assured that only HE can fulfill us in the depths.
So I know that in this 37th year of life I start richer, spiritually, and mentally.. more assurred of who I am and who HE is..and more hopeful in Him and all that He can do then ever before. How great and gracious is our Lord.
